A candle that my parents lit on Christmas Eve in Sherry's memoryAfter more than a year of dedicated blogging about my sweet family's life, I have taken a respite to reflect on the hardest experience I have ever had to face - the suicide of my little Sister on October 24th of this past year. Both Thanksgiving and Christmas came and went, and I struggled through both of them - just grieving for all that we have lost.
I've spent a lot of time talking with my husband and a couple of very close friends (one of whom helps families deal with grieving all the time through her profession, and another whose husband's sister took her own life in 2004) - trying to make sense of something that will never make "sense". I've spent a lot of time trying to help my parents get through this tradgedy - knowing that no matter what I do, I can't take this horrible hurt away from them. I've spent a lot of time reflecting on my own life, and thanking God for all the blessings I have been given. I've hugged my children tight, and I've been angry with God, my Sister and the world in general - - - that this could ever happen to someone I love SO very much! I've visited with my pastors, with a really good counselor, and I've read books on losing a loved one to suicide. I've searched in God's word for understanding and peace. And over the Christmas holidays, I was able to spend a lot of time with my sister's three children - pouring out all this love on them - and knowing that I would do ANYTHING in the world to bring their Mommy back to them - and us!
New Year's Day every year marks new beginnings, new opportunities, a fresh start and a clean slate. Although I will never be "over" this loss and knowing that I have a long way to go in working through my grief, I am happy that 2010 is here and have vowed to come back to blogging - something that brings me such joy!
So - THANK YOU for all of you who have prayed for me and our family, who have taken my kids to play, who have called, texted and emailed me - often just when I needed it most, who brought me meals every day from November 1st until we left town for Thanksgiving, and who have just "been there" through this time. I love you all dearly and appreciate how people have such individual gifts - that together can make such a difference in our lives - especially when we are hurting!
Happy New Year!!!
A beautiful ornament that my best friend gave me - in memory of Sherry! 
3 comments:
Your sister Sherry will forever be in your heart and soul. Not a day will go by without missing her and that is fine. You are such a strong woman Robin and I am very thankful to know you IRL. HUGS and Happy New Year to you all!
~Elyse
Wonderful post! Praying for you is a blessing to me.
Hello Robin,
This is Greg Easterling. You might remember my good friend Jeff Cady. He came across this blog doing a search to try to see if he could find Sherry. He called me and told me about it and my heart was truly saddened after talking to Jeff and reading you blog. Jeff said he remembered Sherry as such an outgoing bubbly person that was so sweet and I totally agreed with him. I know Jeff and I didn't know Sherry and you very long but ya'll surely made a lasting impression on us. Hopefully you will see this post and know my prayers are with you and your family. It's really hard to understand God's plan but just know that Sherry is totally at peace in the loving arms of God. God bless you
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